Every Writer Needs One of These Exasperating People in Their Life

This year, I read two young adult, post-apocalyptic novels that had me appreciating my editor.

The first one, I won’t name since I have nothing good to say about it. Well, maybe one good thing to say: It had a creative premise. But other than that, I was severely less than impressed.

The main character was uninspiring, the other characters were un-compelling and the writing style was lackluster at best. I found myself mentally and emotionally disengaged almost from Page 1, and the ending made no sense whatsoever. Despite its supposed cliff-hanger finish, I won’t be wasting my money on either of the sequels.

Then there was Powerless, which I loved! I couldn’t put it down, and I don’t care how much money I have to spend to buy the next one. When it comes out. Next year.

[Stage Direction: Insert despondent sobbing.]

In the end, I, as a reader, was so taken with the premise and the characters and the beginning and the middle and the ending… and… and… and… Okay, you get the point. I was captivated by this book. I’d recommend it to anyone. In fact, I already have a few times over.

However, as a writer, I did notice how there were some issues that should have been caught before the publishing date. Emotions swung too far and too often, random plot points were brought up that were never resolved, and I believe there were a few typos too.

Which is why I have to hand it to my amazing, beautiful, talented, pain-in-the-neck editor of an older sister, Christina, who catches stuff like that for me, including…

·         An embarrassing amount of adverbs. Sometimes 20 or more per page. I scoffed at her when she pointed out how many “ly” words I was using… and then I realized she was right and did something about it, which turned my stories into much smoother reads.

·         A “whiny” main character whose emotions jumped around too much. I snipped at Christina when she called me out on it… but I ended up applying her advice anyway, ensuring my audience would want to cheer my protagonist on instead of shut her up.

·         A bad tendency to get too far inside my characters’ heads, where I fixate on their mental processes instead of their larger journey. I threw a little temper tantrum about that one too, but guess what? She was right on that one as well.

It’s sooooo annoying how often her advice proves accurate and necessary.

That’s why I have to say, if you find any errors in my stories, it’s because I tried tinkering with them AFTER Christina handed them back to me.

I take full blame. Except for being exasperating. That’s all on her.

P.S. Love you, Christina! You’re the best.

Ravens vs. Steelers… Too Much Fun!

Anyone who really knows me knows I’m a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. Which means I’m automatically anti-Baltimore Ravens. We’re supposed to hate each other. Or so I’ve been taught ever since moving to this proud-of-purple area.

Bleck!

Yet “Moves and Countermoves” main character Thomas Evans is a Baltimorian born and bred. And he’s a man’s man. So I had to make him a football fan in general and a Raven’s fan in particular. It just made sense that way.

Surprisingly for someone whose eyes narrow and lips purse whenever she sees anything Ravens, I had an absolute blast getting into Evans' head and trashing the Steelers a few times over. That’s especially since I made continuing character Rodney Andiluigi – a definite antagonist in at least the first half of “The Politician’s Pawn” – giving allegiance to Pittsburgh.

Which means I got in a pretty decent dig against quarterback “Big Ben” Roethlisberger at one point. Which made me giggle. Which probably makes me a really bad Steelers fan.

Oh well. I redeem myself in Dirty Politics Book 3: “Amateurs Play Elsewhere.”

Come to think of it, I trash the Ravens in that story more then I do the Steelers in this one. Though that’s not because I’m horribly biased. It’s not even my muse Katrina’s fault.

There would be a few more pro-Ravens comments in “Moves and Countermoves,” except that my darling editor – a New York Giants fan all the way – struck them out as being pointless.

So I tried, boys and girls. If it doesn’t come across that way?

Well, we can’t win ‘em all.

Just ask the Ravens.

Okay. Okay. And the Steelers.

But we still have more Super Bowl rings. Don’t forget that.

Scottishisms: No, They’re Not Typos

Anyone who read the first two books of my Faerietales series – “Not So Human” and “To Err Is Faerie” – may very well have noticed some stuff that looks a whole lot like typos.

If you thought I screwed up and missed an edit, that’s understandable. But I swear that isn’t what happened. They’re what I call “Scottishisms.”

Way back in January – I believe for my first blog post, actually – I wrote that I had made a fool of myself with my Scottish editor, writing “British” and “English” as synonymous terms when they’re not at all.

For those of you who didn’t read that blog and who are on the same ignorant level as me, “British” means any citizen of the British Isles, i.e. the United Kingdom; whereas “English” means someone from the much more specific geographic locale of England. Makes sense, right?

Editor Alan Freeman was exceptionally helpful in pointing out that kind of blush-worthy mistake, and he’s also responsible for helping me flesh out my setting with lines like:

“The dense cityscape gave way to seedier neighborhoods, and then again to suburban high-rises until the last of even those buildings disappeared. The limousine kept rolling through flyovers and farmland, and finally into a hilly scenery that was downright stunning.”

That’s from “Not So Human” when Sabrina takes in the Scottish countryside. I had already seen that years ago, so I was able to remember the following thought without any outside help:

“Sabrina had heard people talk about the forty shades of green in Ireland, but she couldn’t imagine seeing more human versions of the color than what she saw on the thirty-minute ride.”

But Alan was the one who prompted the very next lines of:

“And when they drove into a brief rain shower, the following delicate light dancing off of both watery leaves and roadway made the journey even more picturesque.

“Staring out the tinted windows, Sabrina made an offhand comment about the strange weather, only to learn that it wasn’t strange at all. According to her driver, whose partition was down, the Scots had a saying: four seasons in one day.”

Love it, right? And there were plenty of smaller edits he also suggested, such as changing:

·         “Wouldn’t” to “wouldnae”

·         “Not” to “nae” or even “no”

·         “Brook” to “burn”

·         “Such” to “suchlike.”

Oh, and apparently the Scots don’t say “mate” like the Brits – excuse me, English – do. They’re much more likely to say “pal.”

Overall, I was pretty delighted with the changes he recommended. Though I do have to take some issue with the vernacular edits he made to the English Dr. Stewart’s dialogue in Faerietales 3: “Up in the Air” (which is out April 24 on Amazon.com).

Some of them were just downright creepy! I mean, I know I intentionally designed Stewart to be a wretched jerk, but he even had me shuddering with his new vocabulary choices.

Ugh!

Maybe there’s a reason why the English make such convincing villains. Their language alone is disturbing.

An Anglophile I’m Apparently Not

There are so many great ways to start out a blog. I’m sure of it. And as a published author and an avid writer, I should automatically have some brilliant opening line.

I’ll admit, however, that I don’t. Maybe because it’s so much easier to begin a book about fictional characters than it is to talk about myself. That’s probably what comes of being an introvert at heart. I’m a great listener, but for heaven’s sake, don’t make me carry on a conversation by myself!

So since I have a natural allergy to being the center of attention, I’ll shove one of my books-to-be into the spotlight instead.

Brilliant wallflower strategy, I know.

Last week, I sent in one of my upcoming manuscripts to an editor in Scotland. Why would an American author be sending her work to a Scottish editor, you might ask?

Easy answer: My series, Faerietales, starts out in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, and quickly progresses to Glasgow, Scotland. Being the perfectionist that I am, I want to make sure to get the language and setting correct. Sure, I studied abroad in England for a semester and got to travel to both Glasgow and Edinburgh (two of my absolute favorite cities) while I was there…But let’s face it, a week’s worth of tourism does not a cultural expert make.

I’ll talk more about Faerietales – the first of which, Not So Human, is due out next month – in upcoming posts. Right now, however, I want to focus on my Scottish editor. He’s wonderful, just for the record, and I really appreciate his paid-for insights. However, I have to admit that I felt dreadfully ethnocentric when I got his edits back this weekend…

You see, in my head, there are the English, the Scottish, the Irish and the Welsh. They’re all (with the exception of the Republic of Ireland) part of the United Kingdom, also known as Great Britain. I know all of that. Seriously.

Yet somehow, when I hear “British,” I think of English-only. They’re synonymous in my book.

Apparently they shouldn’t be.

Oops.

Hopefully I can redeem myself when I send in the (potentially) last installment of the series next month.